AFC North Predictions

We’re gonna try something new here today. The Little Mime of Hate and will be combining our posts to lay out our predictions for the AFC North. So without further ado…

1st Place
Mummer: Cleveland Browns (10-6)
I didn’t put them here because it’s the hometown team. I did it for a few reasons, the first being that they are stacked on offense. Great WR group, a bruising RB, a SOLDIER at TE, possibly one of the best offensive lines in the NFL, and one great QB. Unfortunately, the great QB is sitting on the bench in favor of Kelly Holcomb’s illegitimate son. The defensive side of the ball is a big question mark, but I think the additions to the D-Line will help tremendously. The only weak spot on this team is at DB, but I don’t think it will be the issue everyone thinks it will be. Wright and McDonald were solid last year, and don’t forget that we have Sean Jones and Brodney Pool patrolling the backyard with them.

Little Mime of Hate: Pittsburgh Steelers (10-6)
As much as I want to buy into this, I am not sold yet. The secondary got pasted in the preseason. That is not a good sign. The other problem i have is that the Browns haven't proved the can beat the Steelers yet. To win the North, they are going to have to at least split. Steelers win the north. I think 10-6 is a good mark. 9-7 wouldn't surprise me either.

PS. It's Soldia.


2nd Place
Mummer: Baltimore Ravens (8-8)
I know this is going to surprise some people, but I really think they will end up here at the end of the year. Troy Smith is going to surprise a lot of people that didn’t get to watch him every Saturday while he was in Columbus. Plus, that defense is going to keep you in almost every game you play.

LMoH: Cleveland Browns (8-8/9-7)
You are a g.d. moron. Brown's find a way to take 2nd. 8-8 or 9-7 will get it done. The Bengals close in with a late season run.


3rd Place
Mummer: Pittsburgh Steelers (7-9)
The offensive line is horrendous. Willie Parker is banged up. Ben Roethlisberger is a b---.
I think that pretty much sums up this team.

LMoH: Cincinnati Bengals (8-8)
Ugh. Bengals finish on a tear to get to 8-8. A sweep by the Brown's keeps them in 3rd.


4th Place
Mummer: Cincinnati Bengals (4-12)
I truly feel bad for Carson Palmer. He leaves everything on the field, never complains and his reward is having to put up with a team of misfits. He fits in with that team about as well as Michael will fit in at West Beverly High. I can see it now, Shannon Doherty looks at him and asks "How my hair look Mike?" To which he replies "You look good girl" and then promptly shoots her in the earhole.

LMoH: Baltimore Ravens (5-11)
While I agree with your assessment of Palmer, how about Troy Smith. As you read this keep one thing in mind, I HATE TROY SMITH. Now, the guys works his ass off to get in back in game shape after weighing in at 300lbs against Florida, basically wins the starting job. All he has to do is be semi-impressive in his starting role in the preseason. What happens? The guys gets Polio or the plague or something like that and is quarantined. Quarantined I say. Who gets quarantined? Ravens finish sub .500 again. If they're lucky they get to 5-11.

PS. Love the 90210/The Wire reference. Is he going to be the guy that says.... "damn" and "That's whack!"?