Alright kiddies, you’re gonna get one monstrous version of our picks this week. Because the NFL is now playing games on Saturday, we figured it best to just put out one large post with all the picks.
Before we get to the picks though, did anyone see Stu Scott on Monday Night Football? He was holding a green and white golf umbrella down on the sidelines during the game. As soon as I saw that I immediately thought “Scary Poppins”. That eye isn’t doing anyone any favors. If someone has a picture of this, please send it to me.

On to the picks.


Thursday Night Dickhead Game of the Week
Sponsored by Stewart Scott’s Creepy Ass Eyeball
Indianapolis at Jacksonville (IND -8.5)
Mummer: Jacksonville
Unless the Colts jump into a time machine, I don’t see them beating anyone by 9.

LMoH: Colts
I do like the Colts. With or without Joseph Addai. I think they are poised to make a big run here at the end of the season.

Game of the Week
Carolina at New York Giants (CAR -4.5)
Mummer: New York Giants
There are easily three great match-ups for this week. Ultimately, this one should provide the most action. I’m completely sold on DeAngelo Williams, he’s a freak.

LMoH: Giants
I think it comes down to Brandon Jacobs. The Giants go as he goes.

Irrelevant Game of the Week
Houston at Oakland (HOU -4)
Mummer: Houston
I gave serious consideration to combining the “Irrelevant” game and the “Hometown” game to create the “Shittiest Hometown Game of the Century”. Lucky for the Browns, it would have fucked with the format we’ve been going with for the past few weeks.

LMoH: Texans
Really? -4? Really?

Hometown Game of the Week
Cincinnati at Cleveland (EVEN)
Mummer: Cleveland
I’ve been sitting here for 15 minutes trying to think of something to say about this game. I’ve got nothing.

LMoH: Bengals
See post titled "I have a question".

The Rest
Baltimore at Dallas (DAL -1)
Mummer: Baltimore
LMoH: Cowboys

New Orleans at Detroit (NO -5.5)
Mummer: New Orleans
LMoH: Lions
Editor's note: I will be picking the Lion's this week and next. They are going to win a game and I am going to take credit for picking it.

Pittsburgh at Tennessee (PIT -5)
Mummer: Pittsburgh
LMoH: Steelers

Miami at Kansas City (MIA -6)
Mummer: Miami
LMoH: Dolphins

San Francisco at St. Louis (SF -4)
Mummer: St. Louis
LMoH: Niners

Arizona at New England (NE -3)
Mummer: New England
LMoH: Patriots

San Diego at Tampa Bay (TB -3)
Mummer: Tampa Bay
LMoH: Bucs

New York Jets at Seattle (NYJ -3.5)
Mummer: New York Jets
LMoH: Seahawks
Editor's note: Make sure you take part in Brett Farve's 4th farewell tour.

Buffalo at Denver (DEN -2.5)
Mummer: Buffalo
LMoH: Bronco's

Philadelphia at Washington (PHI -5.5)
Mummer: Philadelphia
LMoH: Redskins

Atlanta at Minnesota (MIN -2)
Mummer: Minnesota
LMoH: Falcons

Green Bay at Chicago (CHI -7)
Mummer: Chicago
LMoH: Packers

The Thursday night pick is back after a week off due to inebriation. Surprisingly, tonight’s game looks to be a pretty good match-up. But let’s put that discussion on hold for a second, we need to talk about this first.


Steve Young takes a cup to the face and doesn’t miss a beat! But it begs a few questions like, what if that cup had hit Stu Scott? Would he have had a Vietnam type flashback to the Juggs machine? Would the cup have corrected his fucked up eye? Why are Stu Scott and Emmit Smith dressed like they are going to the Arctic Circle? They are broadcasting from CHARLOTTE FUCKING NORTH CAROLINA! Oh and Steve, maybe you could teach that bob-and-weave move to Stu Scott. It might end up saving his other eye some day.

On to the game!

Juggs Machine Game of the Week
Sponsored by Stu Scott's Creepy Ass Eyeball
New Orleans at Chicago (CHI -1)
Mummer: Chicago
Remember the last time Reggie Bush was at Soldier Field? When he pointed at Urlacher and then did a flip into the endzone? Yeah, I think Brian still remembers that.

LMoH: Bears
I always have a hard time picking against Brees and that offense. They are averaging like 130 points a game. That's impressive. However, I like the Bears defense and Matt Forte to do some damage tonight.

Holy shit, I am WORKING the Little Mime of Hate to this point! But, while I should be riding high because of this, I'm actually a little down in the dumps. We've recently received a cease and decist letter from Mr. Goodell. Apparently he didn't take kindly to us referring to the Thursday night game as the "Dickhead Game of the Week, Sponsored by Roger Goodell". So, we started looking for new sponsors and boy have we hit the jackpot. Brace yourselves everyone, the Thursday night game will now be referred to as the "Juggs Machine Game of the Week, Sponsored by Stuart Scott's Creepy Ass Eyeball". If you don't get the reference, follow this link. You're welcome.

Oh, and before you get all bent out of shape about this, please know I mean no disrespect. That dead eye is as cool as the other side of the pillow. Boo-yah!


Juggs Machine Game of the Week
Sponsored by Stuart Scott's Creepy Ass Eyeball
Cincinnati at Pittsburgh (PIT -8.5)
Mummer: Cincinnati
Hines Ward broke Keith Rivers' jaw in the last matchup. The Bengals are out for blood in this one. No way Pittsburgh wins by 8.5.

LMoH: Steelers

I disagree. I like the Steelers here. That defense is just filthy. I expect them to lay the wood too a Bengals offense that will now be missing Chad Johnson. Hoosh might get in the endzone, but it will end there.