I really hate Thursday night NFL games, it throws my whole week out of whack. Setting my fantasy football lineup on a Wednesday is only something I should have to do if I'm going out of town. Not to mention, now we have to make our NFL picks two days sooner than normal. All because Roger Goodell is a dick.

Because of this we've decided that all Thursday night games will be referred to as "Thursday Night Dickhead Game of the Week" sponsored by Roger Goodell. Plus as an added bonus this week, because the Browns are playing, it's also the "Hometown Game of the Week", thus giving us the "Thursday Night Hometown Dickhead Game of the Week" sponsored by Roger Goodell. Now, on to the pick.


Thursday Night Hometown Dickhead Game of the Week
Sponsored by Roger Goodell

Denver at Cleveland (CLE -1)
Mummer: Cleveland
Brady Quinn gets the start. Finally! The only problem is that he gets one day of practice with the first team to get ready. Normally this would worry me, but HE'S BRADY FREAKIN QUINN! I'm more worried about Derek Anderson being able to adjust to the pine pony. Luckily he spent some time their before last year, so he knows what to expect.
Also, I really want to draw some attention to how fortunate we are to have Josh Cribbs on this team. We all know his ability to take one the distance at any moment. But what often goes unnoticed is his ability to make tackles on the coverage team. He's unbelievable. He gets to balls quicker than Tom Brady's mouth, and that's saying something. Do yoursef a favor tomorrow and checkout his coverage skills. Really a thing of beauty.

LMoH: Browns
I am only picking the Browns because it is the "Thursday Night Hometown Dickhead Game of the Week", otherwise I would take the Broncos. The real reason I like the Browns in this game is because Brady Quinn is starting. I believe Quinn is going to have a pretty rough night, 100-125 yards, 2-3 picks and maybe a touchdown. What makes the game appealing to me is Jamal Lewis. I think we are going to see a healthy dose of Lewis tonight, both rushing and receiving. This how the Browns get the win tonight. On a side note, would the Browns please wise up and move Winslow to the slot and start Heiden at TE. Please?!? For the love of God, please!?!

You ready for this America!?!

Cliff "Cy" Lee

Cliff Lee is out of his mind right now. The guy just notched his 18th win of the season last night, which means he has accounted for just over 30% of the Tribe victories. To put that into perspective, CC Sabathia accounted for just under 20% of the Tribe's 96 victories last year. I'm not sure what all this means though. It was just something that came to me when I was making my SpaghettiOs.

Academy Award Shoo-In

While I was enjoying the aforementioned SpaghettiOs I happened to catch a commercial for the new movie "The Longshots". It stars Ice Cube as the coach of a Pop Warner football team who employs the help of a girl to win games. People tell me that it's based on a true story which I found to be shocking. I had no idea "Little Giants" was a true story.

Side note: The movie is directed by Fred Durst. Yes, that Fred Durst.

Derek Anderson has a Weak Brain

I've watched that play a few times now, and I'm fully convinced that if Osi Umenyiora tried to tackle Brady Quinn like that, Osi would have exploded on impact. Again, I'm not sure what that means, it just came to me when I was washing my SpaghettiOs bowl.

Bolt of Juice

When this thought popped into my head I was not doing any SpaghettiO related activities. I just want to know why no one is pointing out the possibilty that Usain Bolt is juicing. What he is doing to these track records is incredible. In fact, incredible doesn't even begin to describe it. He broke the world record in the 100M in spite of the fact that he began celebrating before he even crossed the finish line. Then, as an encore he breaks the 200M record set by Michael Johnson in 1996. Yes, I know records are meant to be broken, but that 200M record was one that no one ever thought would fall. To again put something in perspective, let's say the fastest football player who can run a 40 in 4.3 could sustain his 40 time for the length of a 200M dash. That football player would have lost the race by a full 4 seconds. In track it's widely accepted that .2 seconds could represent a full body length. Again, I'll say it's incredible.

To be clear, I'm not saying he is juicing, I just want to know why no one is mentioning the possibilty.