The Cleveland Sports Mimes

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Week 5 NFL Predictions

Tampa Bay over Green Bay, Kansas City over Denver, Washington over Dallas, and Chicago over Philly. What a great weekend for the Vegas casinos. Let's see how far off the mark we can be on our picks this week.
As always, you can feel free to play along.

As an added bonus, I, The Little Mime of Hate, am willing to make it interesting. I am willing to throw in a $10 BestBuy gift card, if you the reader can pick the week 5 games better than I can. If you can "out pick" both The Mummer and myself, I will make it $25.
Rules and Exclusions:
*You can't be related to either of the Editor's.
*There will be only one (1) winner. If by some miracle, we get two (2) entries, the individual that picks the most accurately will win.
*Picks must be entered by 1200 eastern time on Sunday. That is 1600 utc if you are keeping score at home.
*You must leave your name and email address in the comment. Anonymous contributor's will be publically mocked.

So there it is. Now is your opportunity to show how bad we are at this.

Seattle at New York Giants (NYG -5.5)
Mummer: Seattle
Name one starting wide receiver in this game. Go ahead...try.

Little Mime of Hate: Seahawks
I heard the Seahawks were going to sign Reche Caldwell, but he wanted them to fix his bug eyes. After much deliberation the Seahawks decided the eye surgery was worth more than he was.

Washington at Philadelphia (Even)
Definitely game of the week. I go with Washington because Westbrook is less than 100%.

LMoH: Philly
It is very tough to take down the Eagles at home. I think the Redskins play them tough, but come up a field goal short.

San Diego at Miami (SD -5.5)
Mummer: San Diego
Someone please introduce Pennington to Teddy Ginn. It's enough already.

LMoH: Chargers
Newsflash: Ted Ginn is a below average WR.

Kansas City at Carolina (CAR -8)
Mummer: Kansas City
I expect Larry Johnson to get no less than 60 carries in this game.

LMoH: Carolina
8 points is a lot of points. I just don't think the Chiefs can do it in back-to-back weeks.

Tennessee at Baltimore (Even)
Mummer: Tennesse
Apparently wins against Cleveland and Cincinnati get you an even line with the best team in the AFC.

LMoH: Tennessee
I like what I am seeing out of Flacco. If he only had a receiver that wasn't 112 years old.

Indianapolis at Houston (IND -3)
Mummer: Indianapolis
Did I miss Manning and Harrison's 50th birthdays? God damn. They aged overnight.

LMoH: Colts
It appears that Bob Sanders will be out again this week. This bodes well for me. I have Slaton and Addai starting this weekend in FFL. Both should have monster days.

Chicago at Detroit (CHI -4)
Mummer: Detroit
I'm going to plan my Sunday shit around this game. And by that I mean, I will be shitting during this game.

LMoH: Bears
Are you kidding me? This game has a lot of intrigue. Forte vs. Johnson. Orton vs. Kitna. Lloyd vs. Johnson. Olsen vs. His hands. That's plenty to keep me interested.

Atlanta at Green Bay (GNB -4.5)
Mummer: Green Bay
I hope Rodgers watched that Jets game last week. He'll never be good enough.

LMoH: Packers
Now you're just being an asshole.

Tampa Bay at Denver (DEN -3)
Mummer: Denver
Losing to KC has to leave a bad taste in your mouth.

LMoH: Tampa
Tampa is an overachieving team right now. I like E. Graham to go off in this game.

Cincinnati at Dallas (DAL -10.5)
Mummer: Dallas
Chad Johnson has said he will kiss the star at mid-field in Dallas after scoring a TD. I can only hope that TO channels his inner Ed Norton when this goes down.

LMoH: Dallas
I want to hear Adam Jones shouting... Put your mouth on the star! Put it on the star right now!

Buffalo at Arizona (BUF -4)
Mummer: Buffalo
I need Lee Evans to bring it this week and live up to that new contract. My fantasy team hinges on him doing well.

LMoH: Buffalo
Well then your fantasy team is totally screwed. Way to draft a dependable wide receiver.

New England at San Francisco (Even)
Mummer: San Francisco
That's right New England SUCK ONE!

LMoH: Patriots
Come on now. Angry Bill coming of a Bye week. I'll take the Pats.

Pittsburgh at Jacksonville (Even)
Mummer: Jacksonville
The Steelers added Najeh Davenport to their roster for this weekend. Did you know he shit in a woman's laundry basket in her college dorm room? True story.

Let me tell you about Jerome Bettis...Ah forget it!
As down as the Stillers are right now, I don't think they are bad enough to lose 2 straight.

Minnesota at New Orleans (NO -2.5)
Mummer: Minnesota
Make sure you bring your note book Reggie, cuz Adrian's gonna bring it ALL DAY!

LMoH: Saints
Really? That was really terrible. You should be ashamed of yourself!